Boundaries...
Why are so many people powerless to set boundaries?
Most the time is because we do not want to hurt another person's feelings;
Knowing your own personal boundaries will keep you healthy!
Knowing what is my stuff gives me freedom!
There are things and people that will try to diminish you!
Learning to be able to tell others what "YOUR BOUNDARIES ARE"
This is key...
Have you ever heard someone say, well they never told me that!
People cannot read your mind!
You also can not assume!
We must learn are own comfort and safe zones.
Being able to say I am not comfortable with this;
Behavior
Rudeness
Manipulation
Knowing your boundaries helps you,
And in the long run, it helps others!
We are not responsible for other adults boundaries.
But if you do not take care of your own perimeters
You will open the gate to wolves!
No one can do certain things for us!
People will try to lay all their burdens upon you!
We are all called to carry our own burdens!
So many are just plain irresponsible, and then we are back in a corner,
Look, it's your home and your life;
Believe that you have a right and an obligation to keep certain things out!
The reason a good fence has a gate you can open is so you can let the
GOOD IN
And keep the
BAD OUT
If you don't, you might as well put a revolving door on the front of your home.
God limits what He will allow in His Yard!
He guards His house and will not allow evil to live there.
I learned many years ago to set boundaries!
We do not have to be a door mat for everything that comes along.
Our Words will have to be our defense for setting boundaries!
NO...
That behavior is not acceptable
Drinking
Smoking (cigarettes, pot)
Foul language
Uncomfortable Touch
We can say these things with a voice of ownership!
Mean what you say
Passivity will never set boundaries, but will keep you stuck and you will become resentful!
I had a problem years ago with someone who always brought their dog
Huge dog and he always would pee on my floors!
I finally told them nicely that it was not going to work for me any more.
Guess what, they never came back;
They were mad at me forever!
Yes, it was sad, but that was the beginning of finding my voice and knowing
My limits and my boundaries...
Being honest or truthful will hurt someone!
But the truth will set you free.
Preserving our own soul from wolves that desire to kill us!
Being aggressive for the right to keep our homes safe and our hearts healthy!
Stress and saying yes to everything makes one weak and vulnerable!
Take heart, we are more than overcomers!
I am thankful that in this season of my life I have very few people who
I have really felt the stress of over the years during the holiday season;
But I think we can very nicely say and speak what is on our minds.
And what is acceptable in our lives and homes
Our boundaries can show grace and discipline and bring
Peace to our hearts and Glory to God!
So Please Learn about how to set boundaries,
Teach others how to set them!
There is no reason to be manipulated by others!
We also can see this done through peer pressure;
We can accomplish setting boundaries, while still being kind and gracious!
As Always...
Living From Glory To glory
Hugs, Roxy
Love this!
ReplyDeleteI must confess I sometimes have a problem with boundaries. An example? Because we willing love to watch our friends toy poodle when they vacation, (our dogs were puppies together and love to be with each other), another couple from church just assumed, literally assumed, that will will watch their dog when they go on vacation next month. We have never even met this dog! We don't know if it's friendly or gets along with other dogs or not. We were literally just told they would bring the dog this day and pick it up this day. It's a breed that is notoriously cranky!
ReplyDeleteI still don't know what to do. My husband is an Elder at church and I really don't want to offend these members, but I don't know what made them think we would take their dog without asking.
I need to really learn boundaries!!!!!! Thank you for this post today, it's given me lots to think about.
Blessings,
Betsy
Your blog is like dessert.
ReplyDeleteI like to read it after all the easy or fun ones.
Your blog needs to be last because it is so delightful and satisfying. I usually leave time to ponder and taken in. It is rich and solid. I like what you said, "Being honest or truthful will hurt someone! But the truth will set you free."
This post is very important. Boundaries or lack of them, can be so upsetting for both sides.
Thank you!! ❤
This is so needed. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteHi Roxy, you did the right thing by telling that person about the dog situation. It is too bad that it was taken the wrong way. They should give the dog a good walk before they came over to visit!! It is not fun cleaning up when a dog pees all over your floors.
ReplyDeleteI had someone talk over me at our weekly crochet/knit group and I said what I wanted very loud so that I could finish what I was saying. She then said to me you didn't have to shout. I said I wanted to finish my sentence. Well, I am pretty quiet but when I want to say something let me finish my sentence! One of the other ladies stuck up for me and I was so happy about that! She probably didn't like that I did that but she kept doing that to me. You are so right about speaking up even if it may hurt the other person. I bet she will still do it to me but I am glad I had my say.
Thanks so much for your sweet visit to my blog. I do love using my crock pot . It's great for soup or chili and I like using it when I'm not in a rush to make dinner. I do like using the Instant Pot for quick meals.
If I don't talk to you again I hope you have a nice Thanksgiving sweet blog friend. Julie xo
Boundaries are so very important. Knowing each other's expectations and needs makes for a much more peaceful getting together. Not just for holidays, but for anyday. I know that it took my family awhile to understand and learn how to set them with family. Once they were set in place it took a bit but now there is so much more respect and comfort that comes from having them.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing!
Thank you for speaking truth and life to us.
ReplyDelete